I admire how we had to
become so multi-faceted, as a part of finding new angles to turn to them,
ourselves becoming new angels for each other.
A shared vision, alchemy
expressed elementally with every shimmer and flare that the light only describes
in the chapel windows, not known or seen within each other though continually
recognized of each other and for all. The way the sun might imbue her smile
with hope in that moment on that day.
That is as one thing I ever
thought was worth writing of, even seeing how we read these only within
ourselves, even if at all. Gratitude and its radiance forming our sense of each
other, still somehow unseen within, except in each others’ eyes… Without.
I once thought perhaps the
only way we would be hurt was if we were caused to judge ourselves within,
while failing to seek this reflection of divine guidance without.
Loneliness was only as a
contrivance of unbelief, then. Except this…
Someday maybe we can tell
them what they taught us, at least in absentia of their own cruel intentions, as
they seem unaware of how others feel. Fault, and blame, and sublimation and
omission; so many ways to lie. These things are always theirs now. I know
better than to covet polarization, even as not ever granting it more than a
mild disaffinity. I could always feel the inductive static shock in the fall
between the valance they presented, and the valence of each particle of our
sorrow upon realization of the truth. Contrition.
They taught me to always
share our light, and to say all the things felt, even as I am hoping to say
anything again. Even in burning conflict the entropy we share then can cool
even the flame deluge before us. To see their fleet on fire, as its become, how
they might admire it finally too. I cannot envy them of that, at all, while
within your honor.
And it is alright. The
truth is always known, before it is said. Emerson perhaps speaks of heroes far
better than I could tell her how I know and feel of her in this moment. They
also taught me that there was no need for pride. I thought maybe someday these
plates could be as Psalms, though I do always endeavor to learn from every
step, along our way.
